Watching the movie Memento last night was the final thing to convince me to start recording my thoughts again. Memory surely does get distorted and fragmented over time, and it's nice to have some living proof of the past instead of just some vague ideas. Since my typing speed is more on par with my thinking speed than my handwriting speed is, I'm going to use this blog as my warehouse of ideas. Although I plan to live in Austin for at least several more months, through the end of the summer, I do still kind of feel like I'm out on the open road, takin in the sights in the US of A.
Coming to Austin has been a new breath of fresh air. Everything seems full of life and warmth. The wildflowers are already starting to bloom and our seeds are already starting to sprout. We are learning new things every day, like how to make your own yogurt or ginger brew, sprout sprouts, eat beautiful vegetables for free, and think outside the box as often as possible. I have been talking with my coworker, Sherri, about how we feel like we are living in a dream state a lot of the time. If you stay calm and centered and look at everything as an adventure waiting to happen, life can easily slip into a sort of fantasy world that feels like a waking dream. So while I have been having a lot of trouble remembering my sleeping dreams, I still feel like a lucid dreamer a lot of the time, in my everyday life. Although I am awake I can ask myself the same question that a lucid dreamer might: "I am in control of my own dream right now; what is it that I want to do?" Although my possible answers are definitely more limited, it is such a cool way to approach every day.
What I want to do with my life is simply to keep it as adventurous and free spirited as I possibly can. To completely eliminate the ideas of stress and anxiety and fear. To act upon motives that are as pure and good intentioned as possible. I'm going to farm in South America, bike to Moab with Maya, instruct a WRFI course, release an album with Andrea, work at the hospital in Haiti, write a Requiem, write a soundtrack, become a Reiki practitioner and a massage therapist, study hypnotism and Daoism, research music and the mind in graduate school, run Leadville and Western States, bike across the country from farm to farm with Anna, go on a 10 day Vipassanna retreat. Or maybe I won't. The point is that I could do any of those things if I choose to. Your mind in the present, your memories of the past, your conception of what the future will be, that is all that reality is. Life is a waking dream. Reality is your illusions. So make them good ones knowing the power is all yours.
It is only too easy to stay inspired when you are constantly seeing the good in everything around you.
